All I ever really wanted...

So recently I was hired to do my thing, in educational reform. It is exciting and nerve racking all at the same time. You ever feel like you have waited your entire life for a moment and you wonder if it will be all that you hoped it would be? I am at that moment right now... I am tired and drained and staying at my auntie's house which is more than a notion!

I am ready to have my own despite my current limited resources. I have started the PAID training for my job which is a good thing but I really just want my own place. Its hard living out of suitcases despite the hospitality of family... You never want to impose. You still feel like an outsider no matter how large the welcome mat.

The time difference hasn't sunk in quite yet. So you spend sleep hours awake and wake hours wishing you were sleep. Funny how what you thought you wanted... I mean what you truly in you heart of hearts believed was where you wanted to be... Feels even less like home in this very instant than you ever imagined it would be. So part of you anxiously anticipates the fact that the best is yet to come... While the other part of you longs for the creature comforts of yesterday. You sit wondering if you will ever be satisfied as you search for peace